The kids’ dad and I have been divorced for seven years. I was shocked last night when my son told me that he often wishes that his dad and I were still married. I mean, I know it’s not unusual for kids to wish for that, that they’d like to have an intact nuclear family, but I guess I hadn’t thought about how it effected him on a daily basis. He said he really misses his dad and would like to see him more. He thinks that the only way he’ll be able to see his dad more would be for us to be remarried. Sadly, this is probably true, since XH hasn’t figured out the whole visitation thing. He hasn’t had the kids for an overnight since summer of 2005.
Son said that he doesn’t remember us being married. He was four years old when his dad left for the year tour in Korea where he met his wife (who was also stationed there for that year). Our divorce was final about 6 months after he got back.
While I feel sad for my son and some guilt for him not having an intact nuclear family, I don’t feel badly enough about it to want to be married to XH again. That relationship was not healthy for me and I know I’m a better parent, a better person, a healthier (emotionally) person when I’m not in a relationship with him.